As 2015 ends and 2016 begins

2015
Really, I do not think about too much negativity  from 2015 and if I had anything bad that entire year it was all erased  when I went out to a community  in need this summer for my Field Education  Experience.

Extreme Faith really taught me a lot about myself and what serving/inspiring a community  really looks like. A piece of my thoughts and  prayers will always belong to that neighborhood of Carondolet. Please pray for them also.  It is not every day that you see a community struggling that much. It definitely  humbled me. Every time I hear Touch the Sky by Hillsong I think about Carondolet and pray for them everyday.

Before going into this last summer I use to see my weaknesses  as inabilities that made me look useless but have learned to work on my weaknesses  and turn them into Strengths instead of running from or trying to hide from weaknesses .

Extreme Faith experience  plus my bestfriend Ashley got me a better job as a Level One Medication  Aide. I work with Developmentally Disabled  Adults and love my job. It is really another ministry. I am thankful that this job is giving me experience for my career field as a Community  Support Specialist or another Behavorial Science field.

I am so incredibly thankful I was single. It is weird... I never thought I would say that. However, singleness taught me more about myself and helped me work through some issues I was having. Obviously , I had times where i wish I had a boyfriend  but I got to depend on God even more through that year of singleness. Also, I know now I am looking  for a Christian  man who will be my bestfriend.

Central  was great in 2015 . I got to keep my grades up and have only had mostly  A's and B's since I have been back. No matter how upset I have been with the school in the past I feel mostly grateful for: Spiritual Growth,Friends, and Education. I was so scared I wouldnt pass OT Prophets and I did with a B :-) I loved the way that professor  taught his class with ethusiasm and as a ministry.

2015 I got to watch my first Niece get married. It was such a joy to be her a maid of honor. It was awesome to see her marry a Marine that treats her very well.

Also, in 2015 it was nice to see my family and go to Florida for 3 weeks. I had a great vacation  overall and it went by too fast but I am thankful for the time I got with them and I  Love my family a lot.

2016

This is going to be a Great year! I y am so optimistic  about this year! I finally  graduate  with my Bachelors! And in Christian  Counseling. I had no idea God would call me back to Central in 2014 but he did and I am so thankful that I have a God who is not done writing my story even though at times before Central I gave up on myself. God makes me smile often. It is my joy to serve him and out of anything I do in life serving God and living for him will be the best things I ever do.

So as I metioned I graduate  this year. My official graduation  date is May 13,2015 I am excited and nervous but I have faith to know everything will be fine. I will miss Central but I am ready for another  chance at living on my own with or without roommates and keeping my foundation solid on God this time. I am looking  for any field on the Behavioral Science field but the number one career I am going  for is a Community  Support Specialist .

Please pray for me as my life changes this year that my faith will stay strong and that I find a good career or be content and work at my current job until I do. Thank you! If you ever need  or want prayer for anything let me know.:-)

Field Education Experience at Extreme Faith STL 2015!

       I was extremely excited and nervous about coming to Extreme Faith. I had never driven to Saint Louis by myself ,but I had Blind Faith to know, that everything was going to work out. When I had arrived on May 28th, I was welcomed by Extreme Faith staff giving me a hug and saying "Welcome to the Extreme Faith Family" . I knew from that first moment that God really did bring me to this place.  That day I got showed around and then went to lunch with some of the Extreme Faith Staff.

           When  meeting the  people at Extreme Faith: they were really down to earth, funny and I could tell they loved their community and had a, heart to serve. When looking for an Field Education Experience I wanted something that would teach me to serve in a new way and I wanted to serve with a team that worked as a team. Thinking back through the summer we were another family and we served like a team. Any time, I had a question it would get answered, and when I failed at something, the team did not make me feel like I was less than them. That was very refreshing because I can recall a lot of times when I have failed and  it was held against me. Together, as a family/team we cried together, told stories of experiences, served together and laughed together. We also kept each other accountable to serving to the best of our abilities. Everyone at Extreme Faith genuinely cared for one another  like a family and it was evident how much they love to Serve in Ministry. In some way or another, I learned a lot from: the people that work there, volunteers,other interns and student leaders

                 Carondelet is a community of brokenness and some of these people worry so much about their safety. I learned that even more; on the first week when a few of us from Extreme Faith went on a prayer walk around the neighborhood and a family was outside that the leader of the prayer walk saw . The family came over to us and expressed concern over the community and I felt heartbroken for them . Especially, this little girl who barely talked to me at first but then I drew on a napkin a smiley face for her she then started talking to me about the movie "Frozen". She warmed my heart and when she came to the first few community events we had, she always came up to me, and talked. Another thing, that I got to do in that first week was go on a love project to the Galleria Mall. This was something I had never done before at a mall so I was a bit nervous but I wanted to talk with some people and show care for them. At a love project your mission is to go and just talk to random people and asking about their day and at the end of it you may or may not get the chance to pray over them. I did not expect to pray over anyone but their was a worker that talked about church to me. After a while of talking  she asked me to pray for her to have better finances. 

                   The days were long at Extreme Faith and that is not even a complaint because I enjoyed every moment with Extreme Faith. After training week, I went on this incredible journey of Day camp where I got to teach 20-50 children how to read and write better.I loved every single one of them (even if they had bad moments). They were great children that deserves the best in life.  The Children had a lot of energy. Sometimes I had wished that their was one leader per kid because they were all so starved for acceptance and attention. I got to see their beautiful faces everyday and although at times they got in fights and wouldn't pay attention, I know that while they were there at Extreme Faith the leaders did everything in their power to help them have the best possible, learning/fun experience. I also got the opportunity, to prepare their breakfast and teach them about God even more. At the end of each day I often went home going on pinterest looking for more ideas to help the kids. .

              One day, I was getting kids in line and it was taking longer than it should and this boy began to cry because he thought he wasn't going to be able to eat. I rolled back tears looking into his eyes. I knew him getting to eat was a big thing for him. I  promised this boy that he would  always get to eat and have time to eat. After that, I always made sure he had enough to eat. It broke my heart knowing that some of these kids may not get enough food at home and are hungry. No kid should ever have to worry about food. It is not right. 

               Also, at Day camp I saw kids go from not hanging out with anyone to having lots of friends at the end. Kids that thought they were not worthy of anything always had some leader telling them that they are worthy and that God loves them and so do they. Also, their were kids that started helping out even more towards the end and in that I saw future leaders. I am so proud of all the kids that came to Day Camp and will always remember the memories there. 

Other great things happened this summer as well besides Day Camp:

• On Sundays I went to St. Trinity Lutheran Church. Even though, I am not Lutheran it doesn't bother me I think that you can learn from most churches you attend. What kept me coming back to St. Trinity was the Pastor there. He had such conviction for his church, his community and his sermons were always from his heart and I loved learning from him. 

• During the week, while Day Camp was going on, we had mission teams come in to do service and love projects around the community . Each and every one of them did and amazing job serving. These mission teams were a huge help and came from : Texas, Minnesota, Florida and Missouri etc. A mission team consist of youth groups and their leaders. I think it is a great mission trip for any youth group and anybody that has a youth group should inquire about it.

• Food pantry for people to come in and get food that members of St.Trinity and Extreme Faith got to run. 

• Every other Wednesday their was a homeless night where we got to help homeless people get food and other things they needed while teaching them life skills. The first homeless night I got to help with I enjoyed the most because I got to visit with someone that was excited about getting a job.

• Lastly,  My favorite part of each week which was the Community event. It was every Thursday. It was awesome to see the community coming together and enjoying a free meal and getting to meet new people. Plus their were kids that did and didn't come to Day Camp that would come up to me and ask me to play a game with them and for one girl i was the person that would listen to all of her worries. It was also my favorite thing because I knew when they were at the dinner they some were staying away from different things that were not good and when they were at the community even they noticed how Extreme Faith and St. Trinity cared for them and some would go home and make positive changes in the way they do life. 

• I also got an incredible opportunity to Mentor a Girl Student Leader. She was so much like how I was when I was a preteen. She grew a lot over the summer and was a huge help as a co teacher in the classroom. and she took initiative to lead the class a few times this summer. She may have learned through me but I learned from her as well. 

• I got to help with a food drive and recognize people that gave versus those who don't but I am grateful for all those who did because the food went to multiple food drives and 9 shopping carts of food were filled. 

This summer I got to see some of my weaknesses even more but learned to look at them as an opportunity for growth. I learned: how to make decisions better, how to delegate others to help me, that no matter the mess that is going on that you can stay calm and keep others calm,  I have learned to be more confident, to serve in new ways, to train others on how to lead, to be more flexible, that all communities need Jesus and that when I go back to Moberly I can do service and love projects. 

Some ideas I have: 

• Food Drive at Bratchers or Wal-Mart
• Prayer Walk
• Working on some more ideas

Please if you are reading this and live in Moberly or near by contact me if you are interested in Serving  Moberly more also. Thanks!

Thank You so much Extreme Faith and St. Trinity for all that you do for your community. You have been a huge inspiration to me and this has been the best experience I have ever had in my life and you have made me realize above all else that whatever career I get into I want to do community outreach as well. It was really hard to have a last day  and I will miss all of you but I will be back to visit and I will continue to pray for the ministries and the community of Carondelet. 

The reason i chose to go back to CCCB to become a Counselor

. As many of you know, I am back at CCCB! I never thought I would be returning; but after a lot of stubbornness, and pride issues and people constantly encouraging me I came back. And this time it is for something that i am actually really passionate about which is "Counseling" . Growing up, I  had a really rough history that later led to a great testimony of faith. Anyhow, I was independent  mostly because I was taking public transportation by myself at an early age. So I got to see first hand what the world looked like. I saw a world in need even though I was in pain from stuff crashing all around me . I really had the desire to help people (Not saying I am perfect though) Their were times that I could of helped people that I didn't and that was wrong. Anyway, today their are a lot of people in The U.S. and all over the world and they need people who genuinely care about there problems and can build a trust with them so they are able to sort through their own life problems. Thats the problem with some people today they want to "fix" you when really you can help someone but you cant "fix" them. People that want to change may or may not have good influences in their lives may help them but not fix them. People have to be the ones to change. This has been an exciting journey so far and I hope it leads to a great career. So far since I have been back 2 semesters my grades have improved as well. Please pray for me as I continue this journey. After school, I would like to do something in the social work field like Community support specialist or work with pro life. Wherever I end up working I just want it to serve the Lord.

Good and Bad in 2014

In 2014... 

Bad: 

*I lost my apartment i was living in alone in after losing a job and getting another that did not pay enough. 

* My mom moved into an assisted living place after becoming depressed. 

* My friends 5 best friends moved away Lauren,Kevin, Ashley, Steve and Kia

* Cory went away to go truck driving 

* I was lonely and felt abandoned

* Got a car then lost it within a week because the motor gave out thanks to the private owner who sold me his damaged car. 

* I fell apart over my mom not being the same and not being able to talk to her

In between:  

* I left a church where their were people that became like family however I got called by God  in pursuit to find another church. 

Good:

*I went back to Central to pursue my Bachelors in Christian Counseling

* I had what I thought to still be a true relationship with Cory. We had a 1 year anniversary.

* My relationship with God became stronger 

* My Grades were good both semesters 

* I served in Youth Ministry

* Had good memories  with Ashley,Steve, Lauren and Kevin

* Great summer with Kia as a roommate

* Made new friends at Central

* hung out with Kiersten and Mariah 

Overall, 2014 was not the best but it was definitely not the worst either. I became stronger , wiser and learned more about myself, and helping others. God gets all the credit for getting me through some dark situations. and even though my mom is still battling and Cory left me currently in 2015 I know God still has good plans for me.

Bullying

This is my bullying Story:

 Elementary School: I had short hair and I loved to wear dresses and so I was called a boy who wore dresses. I had a neighbor who told me if I didn't do everything they said; I would be tattled on. In 5th grade, a girl sat behind me on the bus and kicked my seat and put gum in my hair and socked me in my arm.and said I was so ugly she couldn't bear to look at me.

 Middle School: 6th-8th I was called Orka the whale and Raviki (Overweight Wrestler) and the kids in the hall would run away if I walked near them and chanted that they didnt want to be sat on. I was also called Lice girl and rumors would be spread around school about countless things. Kids even at one point told me I had a boyfriend I didn't have. I also had rocks thrown at me. and a girl had a whole class chanting that I was a beep and crumbled up paper and put it in my hair and told people in the class that to look at the paper as lice. Also, my glasses were often knocked off my face and one pair was stomped on. 

 High school: I didn't pay to much attention to bullying but every time I got in an argument with a friend they would call me fat and start rumors which never lasted long.

 Besides School :I was called stupid and retarded by some people who were suppose to be there for me.(Until College I believed I was stupid) People joked about me not finishing High school and I did! and I have worked for some employers that have been bullies. The difference with the employers is I stuck up for myself not by repaying them but by using positive reinforcement and being kind to them when they weren't kind to me.Also, I had a roommate that said I was a waste of space.

 I repented of this but their was one girl my sophomore year in HS I bullied a little bit ( I called her ugly\ :-( ) While I never did any physical harm I know I hurt her emotionally. If you are reading this Blog I am so sorry..

To This Day: I hate short hair on me I don't like dresses except for special occasions and have spent years working on my poor self esteem. But the self esteem has gotten better though God over time . And I'm just trying to pray for those who have bullied me and others that I know are getting bullied or bullying others. Note : Bullying is not just at school its everywhere and bullying can be from anyone. 

 1. If you are getting bullied. You are not alone! Talk to someone! Don't try to handle it yourself because if you do you are just creating a never ending cycle of emotional and/or physical harm. Its good to be different!You have nothing to prove to anyone except God and he knows everything about you. Stand up for yourself I mean don't cause pain pack but tell them its not true and if it gets to the point of physical pain you need to report it to someone you trust. Hang your head high knowing God has a plan for you. Jeremiah 29:11.See yourself through Gods eyes. And he loves you! Also, you can write things you like about yourself and post the sticky notes on your mirror or somewhere in your bedroom as a self esteem booster. Feel free to privately message me too. I'm a great listener.

 2. If you are bullying someone.. Cut it out! you are doing emotional and/or physical pain. Some people will never get over the pain you caused and some will spend many years trying to make themselves perfect because anything else is not acceptable to them. Some will end their lives because they feel alone and that no one cares.Some will seek revenge. A few wont be affected at all. We don't need anymore school shootings. You may think those words are innocent but they are not and they will have an impact on that person. Words do hurt! You may justify it as having fun but that is really selfish to want to cause pain to others for your own amusement and we were not created to be hurtful to others.

 In the end, their will always be those who get bullied and those who bully others. How you deal with it is your choice. I just really hope if you see someone getting bullied you stand up for them. and if you are bullying please stop. If you are getting bullied don't look at yourself as a mistake. Some don't care whether you care what they think or not and so you just have to remember they are bullying you because some don't have a high self esteem and are too probably getting bullied.

Dear Heavenly Father, I pray for bullying awareness to be made more known. I pray that we would stand up against bullying ourselves. I pray that you would heal the heart of those who have bullied others and are living with the guilt. I pray that we would learn to be more accepting of others and ourselves. For you made everyone.Lord, I pray for those I know are getting bullied or being the bully. Thank You!

How to treat a woman (when dating or in a relationship of some sort or just things to know) according to me.

Disclaimer: This is not meant to be offensive. This blog has nothing to do with my boyfriend who is great and I'm happy to be with him. Also,I'm an open-minded person so if any of you disagree with anything message me privately. Thanks!

How to treat a woman according to me!

1. Communication - Just a "Hello,how are you?" Is awesome to hear every now and then. We do want to know the big events in your life too. Also,the silent treatment makes things worse generally. So if you have a problem try talking it out. If she seems uninterested because women can be stubborn. A. Try again or B. Let it go

2. Have eyes only for her- its okay to think another girl is pretty but don't entertain that thought anymore than that because you know the harm it could do.

3. Compliment her- when she looks nice ,when she does something nice for you or someone else,when she smells nice etc...

4. Try not to yell at her: This doesnt always apply but some women are sensitive and when you yell she becomes defensive and yells back or cries or worse the woman can overexagerrate and walk off or think things are worse when they really are not that bad.

5.Reassure her: If you love her tell her whenever you get a chance. Remind her of what you two have and what she means to you.

6. Trust her: Become her bestfriend allow her to get to know the real you.

7. Put God first. (If married, her and your future children should be second)

8. Be romantic : buy her flowers write her notes kiss her under the moonlight candlelight dinner etc...

9. Don't be too critical : A woman needs to know when she does something wrong but handle it with care and don't keep reminding her of what she did wrong. Unless you want her to feel like she can't make you happy.

10. Pay attention to her: when she talks :Listen. Spend time with her by talking and getting to know eachother.

11. Don't complain all the time. If your going to complain try to find positives to say too.

12. Don't be selfish think about her above yourself and also others.

13. Don't show off in front of your friends. This one is self explanatory. Be yourself at all times.

14. Try not to lie about anything : its easy for everyone to feel like lying to prevent getting in trouble but lying makes things worse.

15. Offer to help her. We could always use help with something.

16. Don't put her on a pedestal : she's not perfect she will make mistakes but when she does forgive her.

16.Don't allow your temper (if you have one) destroy your relationship.instead try to talk to a close guy friend or someone about what's making you angry.

17. Compromise on stuff. You will not agree on everything just try to find an agreement

18. Be fun and funny: take her to try some new food or go to a comedy show or even a free scavenger hunt. Not everything is money related. And try to find ways to make her laugh( some women don't have a sense of fun or laughter though)

19. Be affectionate while keeping your purity in tact. Hold hands a simple kiss lots of hugs.

20. Be presentable : take showers comb your hair smell good etc...

21. Spend as much time with her as you can.

22. Never stop dating her even if you marry her.

23. Pray with her and make your foundation about God

24. Try to be happy when she's around you and when your not happy try not to take it out on her.

25. Try to always Be on time.

Next Blog will be : how women should treat a man according to me.

Dare2Share 2013

I know this blog is late but I wanted to tell you about Dare 2. Share. I went to St. Louis with FBC Moberly,MO with the youth group. I was in charge of 8 girls. It was a positive experience getting to hang out with them and learnt more about them. I am still amazed that God can use me in this way to teach the youth about him. This was my first year at D2S and I loved it. They really made teens think about how they see their lives and how to share the Gospel with others. My favorite parts were: 1. The drama: it was on bullying a guy and his friends bully another Guy on the wrestling team. Well one day the guy goes to the optometrist and has to get glasses. Only they aren't normal glasses. When the guy puts them on he sees the guy he bullies getting beat up by the coach and so he sees and feels how it is like to be bullied. He tried to go return the glasses but their was no optical place there. So he goes and learns about Jesus and turns from bullying. Then puts the glasses back on and sees that the guy he once bullied is bringing a Gun to school to shoot others then himself. He meets up with him at the school and talks him into giving him his gun and gives him the glasses. So the bully surrendered himself and shares about Jesus to the kid who was getting bullied and the kid that got bullied got a second chance. 2. The Propaganda poem. He teaches the Gospel. 3. Obviously the fellowship with the youth group. 4. Watching my youth group befriend other youth groups and 5. Watching my teen girls tell a complete stranger God Bless. I saw a lot of strangers smile.

At the end of our time at Dare 2 Share the teens were encouraged to ask a friend what their life meant to them in 6 words and then later at church was given a "Life in 6 words" book and those books teach about the Gospel.

So for those of you reading this blog. What 6 words would you use to describe your life?

Day 3 of a healthier lifestyle

I have called this a diet but really I am trying to live healthier and stay that way. It is definitely not easy. I have not had a soda since Thursday. I don't  miss it so  because I normally had a stomach ache afterwards but it did help my migraines .

Anyhow, today was the first time i have done Turbo Jam in a while and it  was extremely hard but I kept up with it though and I have that burn feeling you get after a heavy workout. I did cardio party and it was 45 mins long. Now it just needs to warm up outside so on  days that I get off at noon or the days that I'm off I can go for my 5-14 mile walks that I use to do in Firestone Colorado and in Florida.Oh and I had Chinese today but I only had 1 plate and I limited my portions plus I had fruit and veggies and I didn't drink soda I had water and hot tea.

Looking in the mirror is a real challenge for me but I am working on it. Working out and eating right helps every area of my life.

Water by the way tastes great but it has to be purified for me to drink it or I won't drink it at all. Friday I drank 32 ounces at work and about 18 at home yesterday I drank 35 at work and 20 at home. Today I have had 24 so far but I plan to drink at least 20 more before I go to bed.

For breakfast and when I'm on the go at work I have a smoothie or protein shake. And I don't eat bread and everything else I cut my portions in half.

If I look like I'm sick or too obsessed with this healthy plan please talk with me because I can go overboard. Thanks :-)

I am looking up a outfit or dress to buy at the 25 lb,50lb,75 lb,100lb mark as a motivation tool.

I am not a morning person...Worst ever!

The night before I set 3-6 alarms because I know I will procrastinate getting out of bed. When I first wake up I go to the restroom to look in the mirror to see how tired I look. It is a good morning if I don't run into anything lol. Most of the time though I run into at least one thing now I may make it through my house clutz free but theirs always walls I somehow manage to run into at work. For the past 3 weeks I have been in charge of opening the store 3 times a week. I like that shift because I'm off at noon but I am not a morning person. I am still pleasent in the morning I'm just ditzy and think about sleep a lot. Everything that I do in the morning seems to be at a slower pace and Im usaully pretty fast. It takes me 15 mins from my alarm going off to get out of bed 5-10 mins to brush my teeth another 20-40 to get ready and it leaves me with 2-5 minutes to eat before I head out of the door. Oh  and usually I go on a quest to find my keys before I head to work. Mornings suck! I now get up at 4am 3 days a week and 8 am is the new sleep in time on ther days lol. I probably should go to bed earlier at night but I like getting on Facebook pinterest etc. :-p. What do you expect I was born in the middle of the night lol.